Weird title, no? Failing Recollection.... Hmm... I was going for My memory is failing me sort of feelings. It's like, I wrote some sort of planning within lines of previous posts, but I can't remember it. If I do, it's just a very blur memory. And here I thought that I've got my Ajournda made as well as downloading the Blogger application on my phone so I can remember better and write in the heat of moment. Geh. I'm kinda useless. What's to expect from the sort of person I am, right?
So... I only have 15 minutes from now at most to come up + type a babble and I can't really remember what I wanted to rant about. The previous post was mainly about homework in the time span of last week to this week. I remember that there was something I wanted to rant about about last week aside from homework. What was it? What happened last week? That's right, there were Physical and Organic II quizzes, as well as Physical lab pre-quiz. I guess I'll do that later since less than 15 minutes won't suffice.
Yea.... I've been saying to write later at home, later at home in the previous posts since last week, or the week before. Seriously, my efforts are failing me big time. I don't study, I don't even post a babble at home. What am I? A lazy sloth, that's what I am. A very dumb one. Yes, indeed. It feels nice to degrade oneself. But it'll feel even nicer when success is achieved and I wonder when will I ever get to that stage.
It's frustrating, yes. Very frustrating. Especially that I never stop gaining fat and more fat. Look at my legs, so humongous! Why don't I exercise? Well, I first need to get outta house. Okay, that's just one of the many excuses, while I could just beat myself up and knock some sense into this thick dumb skull of mine. But... what is a great enough factor that will initiate a life turning point for me? I just think it over and over and then my brain would burn and steams blows out.... Okay, that's an exaggeration, but still!! I would think it over and over and then laze off from thinking about it and do absolutely nothing about it. Nothing, nothing. Geh. At the time being, I feel what should be a turning point is when a crisis graces itself to my family. Or to lesser extent of crisis, when I get out of the house and live on my own. And cleanse myself and start to engage more in spiritual activity to calm and sort myself. I would like that very much, please. If some things does happen soon, or in 4-6 months, I hope I won't lose my university years and able to continue it somewhere else and then get going from there.
My rant sounded like nonsense, eh? I guess so. My future self would be even more frustrated and annoyed with the way I'm thinking now. Maybe not frustrated, but annoyed surely! Very, very annoyed. I mean, the current me is super annoyed but still doing nothing about it, so what about my future self? She'd want to smack my head to death, or good sense of life goal. Then, I hope time machine still won't be made by that time so the current me won't suffer a fatal danger.
Anyhow, Physics class start soon. Gotta go. ;)
Mood: Galau
No comments:
Post a Comment